1. |
Sleep (Intro)
01:58
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Laid in this hole
Depth and distance
Imperceptible
Sleep in silence
The cold moves in
Advancing darkness
A bedside blizzard
Snow and sickness
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2. |
Clover
04:06
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As idle as a sea with no tide
My patience has long worn thin
Tireless in my search and unfailing superstition
I’ve scoured these fields for as long as I can recall
With the sun in my eyes I can only stumble and fall
I’ve slept in this cradle of dead leaves and flowers
Watching the clouds and recounting the hours
To friends who have long since abandoned the emblem of luck
For as much as I’ve tried I can only be met
With assertions that I’ve failed to understand yet
The prevailing unfairness that governs the world
And the madness that runs amok
I can’t let go
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3. |
The Company of Thieves
04:11
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It’s a trite point to make
But one that only grows in prevalence with age
The boredom and longing
For something indispensable and just out of reach
For all I’ve achieved
I’ve got no right to feel this way
So dismal and dissatisfied with who I’ve become
By now this feeling should be so familiar
Knowing all the times I’ve been deceived
But I’m too far gone to change my own mind
Accustomed to the company of thieves
I’m treading a steep slope
Hoping for a miracle to break my fall
Before this resentment
Turns me from living to getting by
The skin still breaks
And the heart still aches
These data points won’t show me where I’ve gone so wrong
For so long I tried to see this through
But time has only led me to believe
That I should turn away from all my passions
And make a living in the company of thieves
You’ve done so well
How can you be so unhappy?
For so long I tried to see this through
But time has only led me to believe
That I should turn away from all my passions
And make a living in the company of thieves
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4. |
I'm Your Chandelier
03:21
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This autumn will see me disappear
Better than to live in fear
You could command a nation with only your voice
Had you the compassion to be given the choice
But my every embrace is met with a clenched fist
I suppose I won’t be missed
Matching black eyes staring blank as the clock hits midnight
Sat on the edge of the bed I hit the lights
Please don’t be surprised love
It’s the best that I can do
Before you speculate my intentions
Know this falls on you
I haven’t felt this free in quite some time
Every action a slight every word a crime
A sheltered existence for your sake
A one way path of give and take
A smile escapes me as I look to see you asleep
Surely I’m not anywhere in your mind
Gravity gives way as my vision fades
Still I’m sorry for you to find
That I’m your chandelier
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5. |
Brother's Gun
05:13
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In your chest
Where the rats have made their nest
Once sat a failing mechanism
Worn down from years of mistakes
That built up a barricade
None of us could penetrate
It’s easy to understand
Why you took it in your own hands
To feel a semblance of control
For the first and the last time
Your mind was exceptional
But not quite infallible
The stories you chose to believe
All of them falsities
Reading what you left behind
There’s something you never could find
All the dreams that you saw come true
Couldn’t change what you thought of you
In the attic gathering dust
Evidence of a shattered trust
Things you could never say
For fear we would turn you away
But I speak for everyone
When I say that what you’ve done
Has left us incomplete
Sharing in your defeat
Still we aren’t ready to let you go
Racked with regret for the things we didn’t know
Bearing the loss of all that we had
Have you noticed our boy always seems so sad?
A haphazard epilogue
A note scrawled in pen with no signature
The frantic words from a heart malnourished and cold
With no vision of growing old
Clutching the empty gun
That claimed both brother and son
A premature goodbye
God himself could not justify
You should’ve told us
Or we should’ve known
And I’m not embarrassed to say
That I wish it was me who had died that day
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6. |
Chemical Imbalance
02:30
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How can we rewire this machine?
To bring it back to zero
Restore the status quo
Something’s gone so wrong
And that knowledge leaves us powerless to stop it
Without a catalyst we can’t trace it
There’s no source and no way to determine where it ends
A fundamental flaw
A deviation from the natural law
The mind was not designed to withstand
A chemical imbalance
A set of adverse signals
Clouding rationale defying will
And breaking spirit
The body can’t fight it
The mind can’t outsmart it
Human imperfection
Self sustaining stasis
A mathematical conclusion
When pain outweighs survival
An instinctive cry for help
Soon turns to murder of the self
Reason breeds resentment
Destroying the alternatives
Conditioning the brain
To only process pain
A chemical imbalance
A set of adverse signals
Clouding rationale defying will
And breaking spirit
The body can’t fight it
The mind can’t outsmart it
Human imperfection
Self sustaining stasis
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7. |
Natalia
04:18
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You came around seemingly by accident
In the haze of static conversation you spoke with such conviction
With liquid confidence creeping through your crooked smile
And eyes dilated to hell and back that burned through the dark
The music died and the lights came up
You slurred an incoherent offer and grabbed me by the hand
I thought it strange that you’d look to me
I guess it’s something only you could understand
And I can only imagine what you’ve been through
To turn you into something so misled
To tell the truth it’s almost laughable
Were it not so pitiful instead
The night went on as we shared in mutual apathy
Drowning a hundred reasons for both of us to leave
By some miracle we were both still standing
When you were pulled away and disappeared as I hoped you’d forget me
Natalia what have you done?
Walking the streets in exchange for a place to rest
For all the charm and beauty you’ve been given
Could you not still hold out hope for the best?
And I can only imagine what you’ve been through
To turn you into someone so misled
To tell the truth it’s almost laughable
Were it not so pitiful instead
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8. |
Dormancy
01:24
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9. |
The Archaeologist
06:11
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Surveying the plot of arid ground
Analysis inconclusive
No traces of life to be found
Only empty houses
Artifacts of a dead society
Or a frantic evacuation
An apocalyptic display
Silent streets on a sunny day
Like something right out of a movie
A portent of global demise
Without any sign or warning
All systems fail and the population dies
Ruling out premeditation
Leaves us with limited possibilities
It appears they were swiftly taken
In some form of suicide by disease
Final entry
Given what I’ve seen
We’ll never know
If they could have been saved
The world has gone so quiet
The parks have turned to cemeteries
I’m afraid the few survivors
Who made it through have simply endured too much
They’ve all gone mad
We’ve all gone mad
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10. |
Identity Crisis
04:53
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With no more hopeful pretense
It’s time I faced the facts
These nightly ventures only serve to highlight what I lack
Judgement corrupted by a crisis of identity
Wash away the pain if only all too temporarily
Standing in the corner as the masses settle in
A hundred times I’ve watched this scene play out
But never found the courage to say anything
Always at the mercy of my doubts
I’m still so lost and desperate
The feeling’s there but the night’s a blur
And no amount of laughter could replace her
There’s no clarity in wasting away this fast
There’s no levity in drinking away the past
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11. |
ER (Thieves Pt. II)
03:45
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Life has routinely shown me
That it’s beyond my control
To alter course and evade what lies ahead
Oh well
I’ve resigned myself
To the mundane trappings of everyone else
I no longer cling to the hope
Of rectifying all the things I’ve left unsaid
In the end
I’ve only myself to blame
When the time comes
Bury me with my name
Let my legacy be no more alive
Than anyone else simply trying to survive
Cause I’m nothing special
No one really is
I’m not looking for you to change my mind
It’s a fact that I’ve come to realize over time
The only universal constant
Is mortality and frankly thank God
I don’t mean to preach nihilistically
In truth it’s a positive for me
It’s a waste of time to sit and wonder
How you’ll be remembered six feet under
It’s only the moments in between
The womb and the emergency room
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12. |
Star
06:13
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Every molehill I’ve encountered
Seemed a mountain on the way back down
But we’re not long for this earth
And it’d be senseless not to leave this town
Cause I’ve been so frightened
Since this feeling came to be
Of knives and heavy traffic
And standing too close to the balcony
And I’m certain now
That it can’t be far
Stumble through the dark
And follow the star
It seems so often
A never ending bargain with fate
A feeble cry for answers
Compounded by reflections of hate
To break the vicious cycle
There is no critical path
In time you’ll come to find
The best that you can do is adapt
And I’m certain now
That it can’t be far
Stumble through the dark
And follow the star
The demons may prevail
And your mind will cry for rest
Victory lies in knowing
You’re trying your best
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Snowflight Portland, Oregon
Whoever you are, wherever you are, I'm glad you found your way here.
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